Against the Laws of Time
by Desi
Summary: Misao gets the chance to go back in time and visit Aoshi before he leaves the Aoiya
1. Default Chapter

Disclaimer: Not mine, don't sue.

Title: Against the Laws of Time

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Starting now the stars will stop...

All nature is silenced,

With the ticking of the law and its measure.

F. Nietzsche

Aoshi ran through the movements with his kodachi, both blades spinning and slicing through the air in perfect unison, obeying the commands of his body with precision. He moved without fault, without sound and without hesitation... the blades an extension of himself. They were one. He loved practicing in the woods, alone, only the forest to keep him company and bear witness to his flawless movements; he wanted no audience to the skills that gave him an advantage over his enemies. Each night that the moon granted him the ability by filling the sky with light, Aoshi would leave the Aoiya and head out to the forest. Often staying for hours as he ran through every technique and maneuver he could, all without disturbing the quiet with his movements. 

After two hours, every technique performed multiple times and his body spent Aoshi halted his movements. His breath visible in the cool spring air as he fought to control it, the sound filling the forest, his chest heaving as his lungs fought for more oxygen. If he could but repress this one shortcoming he would be perfect, unstoppable, maybe even the strongest ever. Aoshi almost laughed; to think of breathing too loud as a shortcoming was truly something only he would dream of.

"Even at seventeen you are this remarkable." Came a soft, female, voice from behind him. Before she could finish her sentence he had spun around, his two kodachi crossed at her throat, the tips pressed lightly into the tree that the spy, about to become his victim, was leaning against. He could not believe someone had actually surprised him and wondered just how long she'd been there. Aoshi's eyes narrowed as he instantly took in the girl's appearance, noting her distinctive clothing, her age near his own and the casual way she spoke to him. She seemed vaguely familiar yet he did not recognize her, was certain they had not met.

"You are Oniwabanshu?" His question was really a statement as the uniform she wore clearly indicated she was what he asked. He stepped back, watching as he waited for her reply. 

"As you see." She bowed slightly and offered no further explanation, which was textbook Oniwabanshu; Yes or No without being too direct, she'd captured that theory perfectly.

Still it did not explain who she was and he could not for the life of him recall seeing her at the Aoiya, although it was clear she knew who he was. Trying to cover his discomfort over being at a disadvantage in this girl's company, Aoshi sheathed his kodachi and turned to fetch the small flask of water from the ground where he'd left it earlier. After taking several gulps he offered it to her which she declined. He cursed silently as he was hoping to buy more time and perhaps figure out who she was. It appeared that he would have to resort to conversation for that discovery.

"Have we met?" He asked after several moments of silence. She seemed to eye him with a look of what he could only call incredulity for several minutes before straightening against the tree where she was now leaning, her eyes boring into his as she spoke. 

"We have been in each others company many times, Aoshi-sama." Her soft voice delivered yet another textbook answer, affirmation without details; one he was certain could not be true. 

He let his eyes roam over her petite frame, noting the almost indecent amount of her legs exposed. His eyes traveled up, missing nothing, making quick note of the long braid of black hair that hung over her shoulder, finally coming to rest on her face. Her features matched the rest of her, petite; a tiny mouth and small nose. Everything about her was small, except her eyes… wide, blue eyes, the color of the clearest summer sky… one could easily lose themselves in them. They were beautiful. She was beautiful and he doubted very much that he would have forgotten her, no matter how brief their meeting.

"Perhaps you are confused because like Hanya, I do not always appear as I am now." She offered. Surprising him with her answer because he had not realized he'd spoken aloud or maybe he'd simply revealed himself without speaking, something he'd struggled hard to over come. Something he'd performed without fault until now… 

Always good at reading people Aoshi tried to get a sense of her chi, not difficult as she made no attempt to hide it, which he thought rather strange, considering her profession, even more strange however was the sense that she was somehow… familiar, yet not. Stranger still was, although he could sense nothing but the truth from her, he was certain that they had never met. 

"You are not wearing a mask." He stated plainly as the possibility of her words sank in and were quickly dismissed. To make certain, he raised his hand and brushed his fingers lightly across her cheek, her soft skin confirming that she was definitely not wearing a mask. She gasped in surprise and Aoshi, suddenly aware of what he was doing pulled his hand back immediately, not sure what had tempted him to take such liberties with a stranger, with anyone for that matter. 

She smiled in response to his obvious discomfort and Aoshi's breath caught as he stared transfixed at the metamorphosis of the girl in front of him. Her smile did not merely touch her mouth but appeared in her eyes, her face glowing radiant and if he thought her rather beautiful before, she was breathtaking now. The light from her smile did not contain itself completely within her, it reached out and gently bathed everything surrounding her, including him. Much as he had been compelled to touch her face earlier he was now compelled to offer her his own smile in return for the honor of allowing him to see hers.

Aoshi watched her face change again from disbelief to wonder and finally settling into a kind of contented hopefulness. 

"What a nice smile you have Aoshi-sama." She surprised him again, not merely with her words but also the wistful quality with which she spoke them. She stepped closer to him, crossing into a nearness that was too close for his comfort he stiffened and narrowed his eyes. She did not miss the sudden change in his manner or the severe look and advanced no further, still she made no attempt to move back outside his personal space she had invaded and he wasn't entirely certain he wanted her to. 

"Who are you?" He demanded growing uncomfortable with the unwelcome and disquieting feelings plaguing him. "What is your name?" 

"Mi… " She began, then hesitated several seconds before continuing. "Mirai." Aoshi didn't miss the hesitation and felt a slight, if only momentary change in her as she did so. 

"That's a rather unusual name." He commented not believing it to be her name at all, he was sure she had her reasons for calling herself that but he did not question her on it. For one, it was late, his work out had been strenuous enough without all this extra emotional stuff exhausting him further. All he wanted right now was to collapse onto his futon and sleep, he turned and took a few steps until he was at the edge of the clearing and stopped. 

"I am going back to the Aoiya, you are welcome to join me." He turned back to look at her as he spoke, witnessing again that lovely smile of hers as she shook her head in refusal. 

"Thank you but I want to enjoy the night for a few more minutes." She sounded wistful again. "You go on ahead." He hesitated, not sure why he did not want to leave her there, unprotected and alone, then silently reprimanded himself for being so foolish. She was Oniwabanshu after all and did not become so because she was helpless and unable to take care of herself. Still… he hesitated a moment longer before dismissing his uncertainty as ridiculous. 

"Oyasumi Mirai."

"Oyasumi Aoshi-sama." She whispered and he nodded before turning and disappearing into the darkness of the forest.

Misao marveled at the power of the full moon as she made her way to the Aoiya, she hoped no one would notice her sneaking back inside at such a late hour, if so she would simply tell them that she had gone outside to get some fresh air. The one who had granted her this small miracle had told her that time would pass at different speeds in both places, while she was experiencing hours there, this place, the Kyoto of her time, would only gain a few minutes. 

As she climbed the few steps leading to the door and neither the overly protective Okon or Omasu appeared to reprimand her, Misao decided to sit and reflect for a bit on the events of the last couple of hours in that other place, that other time. 

"Aoshi-sama." She whispered gazing up at the full moon, a thoughtful smile on her lips. 


	2. Against the Laws of Time part 2

Disclaimer: RK is still not mine. Don't sue me.

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"Aoshi-sama?" 

He stopped, his anger mounting at his inability to simply ignore the soft voice calling his name hesitantly from behind him, at her ability to manipulate his actions and stop him from heading back to the Aoiya for the night. It was late, he'd been here for hours, the promised time for them to meet had come and gone, yet he had continued to wait, to run through his routine again and again, making excuses for her as each minute ticked by and she did not come. The fact that she had met him each night without fail for the last five did nothing to exonerate her ability to not do so tonight. None of his subordinates had ever dared to fail delivering on a promise to him and he had certainly never allowed it, no matter what the excuse and she was no exception. 

Why then was he standing here, looking foolish, waiting to hear the excuse of some underling, slip of a girl? A girl who should mean no more to him than how skilled a warrior she was. A girl who should not even matter… yet, she did matter. To him. Aoshi's silent dialogue only served to make him angrier as the possibilities in investigating the source of these feelings further were far more frightening than any enemy the Bakamatsu could produce. He didn't care; about her excuses, about the vulnerability in her voice as she spoke just now or about her. He did not care!

"Won't you please stay?" She pleaded with him, her voice sounding small and fragile. "Only for a moment?"

Resolve filling him Aoshi straightened his shoulders and made to depart, refusing to give in to the temptation he felt to turn around and look at her. She deserved no such attention in the eyes of her Okashira and he refused to acknowledge those feelings that told him he did not always see her with the eyes of the Okashira.

"You are Oniwabanshu, Mirai!" He reminded her, his voice cold, his manner detached as he spoke. "First and foremost! You would do well to remember that the next time your duty as one of my soldiers conflicts with personal matters."

She remained silent behind him and wisely made no attempt to come up with an excuse for failing to do as she should have. He could sense her feelings of inadequacy at his harsh words but he refused to put her at ease. He wanted her to feel inadequate, to feel foolish; just as he had felt foolish waiting for her while she did who only knew what. He wanted her to know that just as she could manipulate his actions so he had the power to manipulate hers

"Do I make myself clear?" He asked quietly, the chill in his voice unmistakably warning her that she would not be allowed to fail again.

"Hai, Okashira." She whispered after a few moments silence.

Satisfied that he'd made his point Aoshi nodded his dismissal and walked away. He did not get far however, when he felt a fluttering, a weakening in her chi that in his anger he had not been able to sense before. Turning back he looked to where he'd left her in the clearing his eyes widening in shocked surprise as he took in her appearance. She was kneeling, head down, her uniform disheveled and the dark blue and lavender was splattered with what could only be blood. He could see the beginnings of what was sure to be a nasty bruise just above her knee and the handful of accompanying scrapes and scratches in varying degrees of severity located on her arms and legs. She was supporting her arm against her chest, holding it still with her hand and he could only guess that it must be broken.

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Why didn't she say something? He wondered but he knew very well why she didn't. How could she when he would not allow her to do so? He'd been so angry, so determined to make her pay for making him appear weak that he'd failed to consider the reason for her delay, failed to consider the danger she placed herself in while doing her job. He had not even so much as spared her a glance and therefore failed to see… that she was hurt.

She struggled to get up and finally, upon gaining her footing beneath her she turned to walk in the opposite direction. Aoshi silently retraced his steps back to the clearing and called her name. Immediately he noticed the stiffening in her shoulders, the way her back grew rigid as she prepared for what she believed would be further berating from him. 

"Yes, Okashira?" She asked without turning around and for the first time since earning that title it held no charm for him. It was suddenly bitter and caustic as the sound of it, spoken in her voice, echoed around him and settled on the forest floor. 

"Turn around Mirai." He commanded quietly stepping closer to her as he did so. When she failed to move after several moments he placed a hand on her shoulder and with the lightest pressure urged her to turn toward him. If he'd been shocked at the sight of her injuries from a distance, he was aghast at seeing them up close. One small item of relief, her arm was not broken after all; it was merely sporting a deep gash that was several inches long and still bleeding. When he forced her chin up he grimaced at the bruise growing on her cheek, the dried blood that had trickled down her chin from her lip where it had been split. 

"How did this happen?" He asked taking her elbow and leading her to an old tree stump to sit on. He knelt in front of her to further inspect her wounds. "Wasn't anyone there to back you up?"

"Only Saitoh-san." She sighed heavily, almost absently then seemed to start in surprise as his eyes narrowed sharply.

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Saitoh-san? He wondered at the familiarity of the name, mulling it over, searching the banks of his memory and could not help the surprised gasp when he spoke his findings. "Mibu's wolf?"

She made no comment, merely nodded, her eyes wide and apprehensive. He knew of all the Oniwabanshu's dealings with the Shinsengumi at present and not one included such close involvement with the wolves of Mibu. His eyes narrowed suspiciously as he considered the possibility that he did not know everything after all, that even the Okashira was sometimes left in the dark about things and it did not sit well with him. Just as it did not sit well with him that she had been sent on such an assignment. The Oniwabanshu was not in the habit of discarding soldiers in this manner and although she displayed skills that were useful, she was not in the same league as the wolves of Mibu. 

"Who assigned you this duty?" He demanded.

"No one." She spoke quietly almost guiltily it seemed to Aoshi. "I volunteered."

"You… volunteered?" He had not expected to hear that, she had to know this assignment was clearly out of her league, he saw no need to ask her why. He could see plainly in her blue eyes that she had done it to prove something, that she needed to show her strength, for whatever reason.

He told himself silently that as her Okashira he had to acknowledge her right to such tests of strength and ability but as he grudgingly admitted earlier, he did not always look at her with the eyes of the Okashira.

"I will speak to Okina about this." He informed her knowing that it had to be him, Okina was the only one allowed to make such decisions in his place. 

"No! You can't!" She cried frantically as she tried to stand up but failed as Aoshi's hold on her shoulders kept her seated. "Please… just leave it, I've revealed too much already."

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What the hell does that mean? He wondered watching as she chewed her lower lip nervously and her hands fisted in her lap tensely. He contemplated the secrecy and obscurity surrounding her and despite all that he had been taught, all the doubt warning him to be cautious, to be suspicious; he could not help but trust her. As always her emotions were bared before him, before anyone who dared look at her and as always there was nothing to fear. He would leave speaking to Okina for another time, right now he needed to get her wounds cleaned up.

"Very well." He conceded and climbed to his feet pulling her up with him. "I will leave it for now."

He was rewarded with the return of her bright smile and he was thankful that she had forgiven his earlier mistreatment of her. Taking her elbow again he began to lead her across the clearing to the edge of the trees. 

"Let's get you home… " The rest of his sentence was cut off as she halted mid step and he turned to check on her. "What is it?

"I can't." Her voice sounded oddly regretful; there was a long pause before she continued. "I… it's dangerous… I shouldn't be seen at the Aoiya right now."

"Your assignment is finished for the night." He told her in the commanding voice of the Okashira, making certain that she realized there was no arguing this point any further. "If you don't get those wounds taken care of you'll be no good to anyone."

He could clearly sense in her the willpower she was using to keep silent, her brows were drawn together in a revealing frown and the fist of the injured arm she clutched to her chest clenched, holding tight the urge to take a swing at him. He almost wanted to laugh; it seemed as though he had seen this display a hundred times, intentionally provoked it even but he often felt this sense of deja vue in her company and dismissed it.

"Come." He urged her with a slight pull on her elbow, she thankfully obeyed and the rest of their journey through the woods was made in silence. 

She followed him through the silent halls of the Aoiya, her feet moving without sound, just as he did. He noticed immediately that she was no longer moving behind him. He turned to find her facing a set of closed shoji, a strange look on her face.

"Misao's room." She whispered matter-of-factly.

"Ah." He agreed. "She's away."

"I remember." Her voice barely audible even in the silence.

He wondered what she meant by that and even more, the way she said it, it was showing something akin to regret maybe… no it was more like melancholy and it reflected in her eyes. Her eyes were always so overly expressive it was as if every thought and feeling could be seen in their azure depths, it made him wonder, what did she see in his eyes. He'd often been told they were cold and fierce but was that how she saw them? She, who looked at the world in a way that he had never considered.

"She misses you terribly Aoshi-sama." Mirai's softly spoken words jolted him out of his reverie. After several moments he could form no reply and so he nodded briefly and ordered her to stay where she was while he went to retrieve the items needed to clean and bandage her wounds, returning after only a few minutes.

"Follow me." He instructed as he walked past her, leading her to his room at the end of the hall he slid back the shoji door, allowing her to enter before he followed her in and closed the doors behind them. He led her to a window where the moonlight beamed in through the narrow opening; he set the tray holding a bowl of water and strips of cloth between them where they sat on the floor. 

"I'll start with your arm first since it seems to be the worst." He told her as he took her hand and pulled her arm into the light, gently wiping from the inside of her elbow back to her wrist. The dark russet was soon erased from her pale skin and he was glad to see that the cut that had bled so much, although deep, was not a gaping wound but a slice, most likely from a knife or sword. Still it was a clean, narrow line and would hardly be noticeable once it healed. He wrapped it carefully with the bandages he brought and after cleaning the few remaining small scrapes he turned her arm over and began wiping at the small wounds on the topside of her arm and the back of her hand. Finished with one, he grabbed her other hand and lifted it to the light; there were no deep cuts like the other one but many scrapes that needed to be cleaned. Rinsing the cloth he ran it up her arm and back down, removing all the blood and grime from her fight, turning it over and cleaning the other side he spied one scrape on the back of her hand that was bad enough to warrant a bandage. Her small hand, resting in his while he bandaged it looked so fragile, she was fragile; however, she was not weak and those that dismissed her because of her appearance fell victim to her greatest asset. Fragile as fine porcelain she may be but she was also strong, fast and tenacious; he had no doubt that she dished out plenty of punishment to whomever wounded her earlier this evening… he had no doubt what so ever. 

After quickly cleaning the remaining minor scrapes and bruises and wrapping a bandage around her leg to cover the deep cut above her knee Aoshi retrieved a fresh cloth and poured clean water over it. He climbed to his knees to get a better angle before he started with the wounds on her face. 

He dabbed lightly with the damp cloth on her bruised cheek, trying carefully to avoid pressing too hard and hurting her only to cringe at the sound of air hissing sharply through her clenched teeth. He sighed heavily in exasperation then looked down into her upturned face; her eyes were wide, the apprehension could be seen clearly through the brave front she was trying to put forward. He couldn't do this with her looking at him that way. 

"Try thinking of something else." He told her lifting his hand away from her face.

"Something else?" She questioned him quietly.

"Ah. Something other than the pain. Think of your favorite things." He explained watching as a small smile appeared on her mouth and lit up her eyes.

"Mmm…my favorite things…" She whispered whimsically her eyes closing as her imagination took over. "Misao's game."

"Ah." He agreed and began to once again dab at her wound. Once the bruise was gone it wouldn't be too bad, it was really no more than a scratch, the bruise making it appear far worse than it was. He continued wiping, cleaning dirt and blood from her forehead, her temple and her other cheek. She didn't seem to be aware of any discomfort as she was so relaxed and lost in her game. He noticed her flinch when he lightly touched her bruised lip while inspecting it. He was almost done and wanted to make certain she remained distracted while he finished and so he continued talking, keeping his voice calm and quiet. "How do you know Misao's game?"

"I know all of Misao's secrets." If he didn't know better he'd think she was actually teasing him but with her eyes closed it was hard for him to be certain.

"Is that so?" He asked lightly, dipping one corner of the cloth into the water and tipping her head back further to wipe her chin. There was nothing beneath the blood, which meant it all came from her mouth. He dabbed gently as he could, cleaning the blood from her bottom lip. "And what are Misao's favorite things?"

Her eyes opened slowly and met his, immediately pulling him into their deep blue depths. He'd been safe before when they were closed, but now… now he was held captive and he could see plainly that she was just as much a prisoner within his.

"The same as mine." She whispered and he could feel the warmth of her breath against his skin.

She was so close… so close and so very lovely and although his head screamed at him to get away from her he could not seem to stop himself and lowered his lips to capture hers. Her mouth was soft and sweet under his, just as he imagined, not knowing he imagined it at all until that very moment.

"Okashira." The quiet call from outside the door made them both start in surprise and jump apart. Their eyes wide as they stared at each other, unable to utter a word. "A message just came in for you."

"Sumimasen." Aoshi excused himself, feeling completely awkward and not at all wanting to leave her just then, although she knew, as well as he, that his duty demanded that he do so. 

In what had become a routine over the past week, Misao made her way through the woods back to the Aoiya where she sat on the steps and contemplated her evening. She actually had thought she was going to miss her chance to go this evening. Her work with Saitoh-san had taken longer than expected and although she could have avoided all the injuries she had received and been on time to meet Aoshi, Misao was not one to turn down those who needed help. It had taken even longer to escape Omasu's nursing attempts once she'd gotten a glimpse of Misao's injuries and although her time with him would be shortened and she would have some explaining to do she made her way into the forest, determined to see him.

"Misao." She jumped at the sound of Aoshi's voice turning slowly to face him, wondering how he had managed to follow her back to this time then realized that he'd called her Misao. This wasn't the same man from the other time, he was but, he was different; this was Aoshi-sama, the one she had always known. "May I join you?"

"Of course." She invited him to sit down and was surprised when he took the empty space on the step next to her. She could not help but stare at him, she always did but now it was different, now it was almost like she was taking inventory. Comparing the Aoshi of today with the one she met in the past, the differences in how they wore their hair, the way her Aoshi-sama's eyes were often narrowed and sharp was completely different from his younger self. There was one thing that had not changed, however and she could not help but stare at his mouth, the same soft lips his younger self had kissed her with; she could still recall the feel of his mouth, pressing lightly against hers. He had kissed her and she had not wanted him to stop, even now she wanted him kissing her, touching her and it took all of her will power to tear her eyes away. 

"I see you've had your injuries taken care of." His soft voice broke into her thoughts, she nodded unable to offer any other reply and he continued. "Omasu was worried about you but it looks like someone did a good job of bandaging you up."

"Hai." She agreed quietly stealing a glimpse at him, blushing as her eyes were drawn immediately to his mouth and wondering how it would feel on hers. No, she did not have to wonder, she knew.

"Is something wrong Misao?" He asked and she lifted her eyes to meet his then hurriedly looked away. That kiss had changed everything and she could not look at Aoshi, even this one, without wanting him to kiss her again.

"Aren't the stars pretty Aoshi-sama?" She looked upward, trying to cover her discomfort with idle chat.

"Ah." She turned to look at him once again; his face turned up to the sky admiring the stars she spoke of. He really was beautiful and she wished that she could do something to erase the shadows from his eyes, to return some measure of that boy she had met, that other Aoshi who still possessed the ability to smile from his heart. Maybe there was… maybe she could do or say something to that other Aoshi that would help make things different for the one who now sat beside her.

"Aoshi-sama?" Misao hesitated.

"Yes. What is it?" Aoshi replied still looking at the sky.

"I… If you could… If it were possible… " Grrrr. This is harder than I thought, she grumbled silently trying to form the words in her head. "If you could change one thing, before it happened, what would it be?"

She watched him in silence as he continued to look at the stars; she was afraid that he wasn't going to answer her when at last he spoke.

"You cannot change the past Misao." His quiet voice filled the silence. "No matter how much you may wish to; what is, is."

"I know that Aoshi-sama." She agreed quietly accepting fate as she knew it to be. "But if I could just say something, anything that would provide even the slightest comfort to someone I know will need it… what could I say Aoshi-sama?"

"I don't know but I'm sure you will think of something." He climbed to his feet beside her his face still turned up, looking at the sky. Aoshi was silent for several moments before he spoke again, looking at her as he did so. "I'm glad you came back Misao."

With that he turned and left, disappearing into the darkened doorway that led inside the Aoiya. Misao was dumbfounded as she contemplated the last words he had said to her. Did he mean he was glad she came back in time? Did he somehow know everything? She shook her head, denying the possibility. He probably meant he was glad she came back from her job with Saitoh-san or he was glad she came back after her dash from Omasu's mothering. 

Laughing at herself Misao climbed her feet and made her way to her room. There she lay awake half the night thinking about how Aoshi had kissed her and how much she hoped he would do it again. 


	3. Against the Laws of Time part 3

Disclaimer: RK belongs to Watsuki.

Warning: A steamy kiss, nothing more

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Not for the first time in the last several minutes, Aoshi wondered what the hell he was doing out here in the middle of the night, behaving like a child, not to mention with whom. He had been determined, promised himself even, that she would not carry him away again. He certainly would not kiss her again as he had two nights ago. Easy enough… as long as she wasn't standing in front of him, however, he could feel his resolve dissolving after only a few minutes in her company and before they parted company last night he had kissed her again.

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So much for the Okashira's hard as nails resolve. Aoshi thought and not without a note of self-derision as he sat, crouched down and hidden, waiting for her to walk by as she tried to sneak through the woods. Another of Misao's games they'd been at for most of the night, it had taken her quite a while to find him and only after his near silent chuckle had revealed him to be in a nearby tree. Observing her the entire time as she searched, cursing at him and herself, even proceeding to stamp her foot a few times in frustration. Forfeiting his blue scarf as payment for being found was well worth the price. Fully expecting her to end it after it took so long to find him, Aoshi found himself coerced into having to search for her.

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What is it with this girl and Misao's games? He wondered with what one might call artificial contempt. 

Actually, the game was quite practical as it was training in a sense; it helped to improve tracking and evading skills and besides… it was the closest thing resembling fun that he'd had in quite some time. His attention was caught by the sound of a small twig snapping and he tipped his head slightly so that he could peer between an opening in the bushes he was nestled amongst. He smiled as he had guessed correctly when he'd assumed she would come to this particular spot. She had unwittingly admitted knowing all of Misao's secrets the other night but what she did not know is that he knew many of Misao's secrets as well; the hiding place she was heading for being one of them. Shifting noiselessly, Aoshi moved into a position more suited for pouncing and waited for his victim's approach. She had warned him against going easy on her simply because she was a girl and although he would never dream of such a thing before, he now found himself at odds on how to attack without hurting her. 

Like a tightly coiled spring he waited as her footsteps whispered through the forest, barely making any sound, yet to his ears it was like a giant stomping, nearer and nearer. At last she was in front of him, still he waited, watching her perform a slow pirouette as she scanned the area around her, she cleverly kept to the shadows, walking among the tall, thick, trees… or she had. Aoshi had to hold back a knowing smile as she turned and obviously believing herself home free with no need to remain cautious stepped into the small clearing. Aoshi made his move; springing out like a stalking leopard, he leapt at the unsuspecting girl who recognized the sound of rushing air too late to do more than turn slightly as Aoshi wound his arms around her calves in a tackle that set her off balance. She could do little more than stare at Aoshi's triumphant gaze as she fell in an ungracious heap on her backside.

As he expected she wasted little time before she attempted escape, trying to hit him with a quick elbow strike. When he stopped her elbow and she followed through with her fist, he smiled at her improvisation as it showed her unwillingness to give up. Even when he caught her fist and held it she tried to strike with the other, which he caught as well. She tried to squirm from beneath the leg he had thrown across hers to pin her, she failed do more than move the leaves on the forest floor and once again attempted to pull her hands free of his, once again, without success.

"What will you do now Mirai?" He teased trying not to laugh as her eyes narrowed in angry resentment. "You cannot break free."

She huffed and pouted, much the same way he'd seen Misao do when she was displeased with someone, mainly himself or Hanya. She pulled at her hands once more but gave up as his grip did not lessen and then sighed heavily in her defeat.

"I guess I'll have pay up." She spoke dramatically, her voice filled with great pain and suffering. He could no longer hold back and laughed, trying unsuccessfully to hide her own laughter, barely managing to hold on to her annoyed tone as she spoke. "But I'll have you know that is my favorite hair accessory." 

"That was my favorite scarf." He nodded to where she had tied it around her wrist, toying with the knot with his thumb then glanced at the clasp at the end of her braid. "And I am certain it is worth more than that trinket in your hair." 

"Well, if you feel it's of so little value." She huffed indignantly. "Why didn't you choose something worth more."

He wondered what could be worth more than witnessing her petulant display of false anger; her brows drawn together in a frown, trying to hide the laughter in her blue eyes, her chin lifted defiantly even though she lay pinned to the ground, unable to escape. Her mouth. He swallowed hard at the lump in his throat, remembering the feel of her kiss, it tempted him… tempted him beyond measure. _'…choose something worth more'_ she had said and he found he could not argue with such a perfect solution.

"Something worth a great deal more." He whispered lowering his mouth to hers, pinning her hands to the ground above her head. He could feel her through their clothing. Her breasts pressing against his chest, her thighs against the leg that he'd thrown across them to prevent her escape and the bare flesh of her arms as he released his hold on her wrists and trailed his fingers down the soft skin. She was so warm; he could feel it in every part of him that touched her and he wanted more. He wanted to bury himself in her warmth, never to rise from it again. Her arms wound around him pulling him further into her warmth, her fingers buried themselves in his hair. He moaned, desperate for more, deepening their kiss in search of it, his tongue now danced with hers, his hands cupping her cheek, sliding into her hair, anything to feel more of her warmth. 

__

Does she feel this as I do? He wondered as his mouth continued to caress hers. Her soft moan, voiced into his mouth would indicate she did. He did not want the kiss to end, yet he was not content to kiss merely her mouth and despite her whimpering protest his lips abandoned hers and brushed lightly across her cheek again and again. He heard a small gasp and felt the light shiver run through her as his lips touched the sensitive skin of her neck. Her fingers left a warm trail as they slowly drifted from where they were buried in his hair, down the back of his neck and over his shoulder, finally coming to rest in the middle of his back. 

"Aoshi-sama…" His name a breathy whisper tickling his skin.

Time stopped, frozen still as that one whisper rushed through him like ice … Aoshi-sama. Not simply Aoshi but Aoshi-sama. Okashira. Not her lover but her superior… the two of them were not just a man and a woman, they were the commander of an army and one of his soldiers. He lifted his head and met the powerful gaze of her deep blue eyes. Still… it was so easy to forget; when she was this close and her wide blue eyes implored him as they did now.

"How did you know I would come here Aoshi-sama?" She whispered startling him.

He was silent for several moments, still lost in those cerulean depths.

"I have played this game with Misao many times." He finally spoke lifting his hand and pointing at the entry to her secret hiding place. "I know some of her secrets as well."

Her mouth curved in a slight smile as she nodded in response to his answer then her gaze shifted, looking at something over his shoulder. The smile left her lips almost immediately and her face showed something that he was not used to seeing from her, sadness. The effect was profound as it didn't merely show in the absence of her smile but it filled her eyes her entire being emanated it… it was almost tangible.

"Mirai dooshite?" He asked quietly trying to pull her back from where it was she'd gone, wanting to shelter her from what made her sad. 

"The moon." She replied in a voice that was barely audible and was silent for several moments before she continued. "It's waning." 

"It always does." He told her. "This is the law of nature."

"Only one day left…" Her voice filled with the same sadness that he could see in her eyes. "…and the full moon will be over."

"Ah." He agreed absently wondering why this should make her so sad and what he could do to stop it. Her emotions were always so unrestricted and open that it was difficult for those around her not to feel it as well, or maybe it was only difficult for him. It didn't matter, he only knew that it did not suit her to be without her smile and he would do anything to return it to her. Lifting his hand he brushed his fingers lightly across her cheek. He wracked his brain trying to find the appropriate thing to say to her and finally it came to him, something she had mentioned several times during their time together.

"Misao's coming home tomorrow." He told her. "Omasu and Okina went to pick her up."

"Aoshi-sama…" The happiness evident in her quiet voice could also be seen in her eyes. She covered his hand that still lingered on her cheek, with her own. "I'm glad. I'm so glad"

---

"Couldn't sleep?" 

The quiet voice from the shadows halted her in her tracks as she made to climb the few steps to the Aoiya. Her head snapping up, her eyes narrowing as she searched and finally settled on the still form leaning next to the doorway. Tall and ominous, his arms crossed over his chest as he watched her approach.

__

Just like last night. She thought as she eyed him curiously, wondering at this strange behavior of his. She knew that although she'd been in the past for a few hours she'd only been gone from here several minutes; hardly enough to create suspicion over her whereabouts. 

"No… I couldn't sleep." She replied hoping he would let it drop.

She could feel him staring at her for several long moments before he nodded and turned his attention to the night sky. She silently observed him from where she stood at the bottom of the stairs, he was so still, one might mistake him for a statue if not for the occasional blinking of his eyes and the slow rise and fall of his chest as he breathed.

__

A beautiful statue. She thought as she stared at him standing so motionless in the darkness. It was funny how she associated him with a statue… cold, inanimate and immovable but she knew him to be something else now, something more than what she saw before her now. He was the same man she knew in the past time, he had merely enveloped himself in a self-protection mechanism, created out of necessity for someone who felt things too deeply. The end of the war and all they had fought so hard to preserve, what they believed was right. The murders of his friends and the continued struggle to find some meaning to it all.

__

He doesn't look cold at all. She thought correcting her earlier assessment. _He looks… sad_.

She climbed the stairs and stopped before him. He made no move to acknowledge that she was in front of him but that didn't matter to her now and at the risk of rejection, not caring whether he pushed her away or not she leaned forward and wrapped her arms around him. She was surprised that he didn't' move, didn't show any reaction at all; no stiffening at the unwelcome feel of human contact, nothing. Still, he did not push her away. She held him for only a few moments and without saying a word she made to enter the Aoiya. 

"What was that for?" His quietly spoken question stopped her.

"Because you seemed so sad." She answered him turning back to look at him. His face was still averted, his arms still crossed over his chest, one would never know that she had just embraced this man.

"Ah." He agreed surprising her.

"Aoshi-sama…" She could not help the concern in her voice.

"The moon is waning." He interrupted her and she could do nothing but stare in wide-eyed disbelief at hearing words she had spoken to him only minutes before, minutes that had actually been years. "I always feel sad when the moon is waning."

She was shocked into silence, unable to utter a word as he turned to look at her, his eyes searching, for what she could not fathom, an answer perhaps.

"Why is that Misao?" He questioned quietly.

She could offer him nothing more than a shaking of her head indicating she didn't know. A jumble of thoughts whirled around in her head. _Does he know?_ She asked herself silently. _Have the things I've said and done in the past altered the present so much… so soon?_ Giving herself a mental shake she dismissed the idea as ridiculous. After all the important people he met as Okashira and afterward, all the events and experiences he's had he certainly wouldn't be so influenced, probably wouldn't even remember the appearance of some scrawny girl for a few days when he was seventeen.

__

I really am being stupid. She nearly laughed at herself. 

"It's late." Aoshi's voice interrupted her self-reprimanding thoughts. "You should get some sleep."

"Hai." She agreed after a few moments of silence. "Oyasumi Aoshi-sama."

She heard him whisper 'goodnight' as she walked into the darkness of the Aoiya and made her way to her room. 


	4. Against the Laws of Time part 4

Disclaimer: RK belongs to Watsuki, I just like to borrower a few of the characters from time to time.

Warning: A lemon scene, fairly tame, as those things generally go (nothing explicit) and it doesn't take up much of the story. 

Thanks to: P. Rico-san on the AMML for suggesting the challenge, I would have never come up with the idea of this story if not for her. Thanks to all the people and their nice comments and those who helped point out the mistakes that I made, they are appreciated. Thanks to Watsuki, who I am sure reads _all_ of my fanfiction, for providing such wonderful characters and Jane Austen for the lovely words below. Thanks to the academy for… hee hee.

=========================================================================================== 

You pierce my soul.

I am half agony, half hope.

Tell me not that I am too late,

That such precious feelings are gone forever.

I have loved none but you. J. Austen

__

How could this have happened? Aoshi wondered not for the first time. He knew the Ishin had their own spies, but for the Oniwabanshu to be lead into such a position, to be exposed as they were tonight. He cast a sidelong glance at the injured Hanya being carried on a stretcher as he walked beside him and hurriedly looked away again. He'd been hurt and although he had not sustained anything life threatening it was serious enough that he would be out of commission for a couple of weeks. This was a war and that meant that everyday armies were lead into traps and soldiers were killed and wounded.

__

But not my army… He vowed balling his hands into fists, feeling the painful bite as they dug through his gloves and into his palms. His hands had not stopped shaking since their retreat… he had not stopped shaking. He stole another quick glance at Hanya, feeling his injuries as if they were his own. _Not my army and not my soldiers._

It was lucky for them that they got away with so few injuries, Hanya's being the worse by far, everyone else escaped with little more than a few scrapes and bruises. From a commanding position he'd not been involved in the initial fray, only joining the fight after realizing that it was a trap and they needed to get out with the quickest means possible. He'd wasted little time and with deadly precision moved through as many of the enemy as he could to allow for escape.

"Get Hanya inside and have him treated immediately." He ordered and stood aside to let the others walk by and into the Aoiya. "The rest of you as well, then get some rest."

Standing beside the rain barrel at the back of the Aoiya, Aoshi began absently pulling at one finger-less glove, his shaking hands accompanied by the damp, sticky, blood which worked like glue made it difficult to make any progress. Taking a deep breath, forcing himself to relax he began again only to pause as he looked down. His clothing was covered in the blood of his enemy; he could see where it darkened the fabric. He could feel where it had splashed on his face; the slight itch it was causing as it dried. He had slashed through them without a second thought, he had marched home with their blood covering him from head to toe and yet… and yet; he shivered at the violent urge that ran through him, not liking where his thoughts were wandering. Giving himself a mental shake Aoshi returned to his struggle with the gloves managing to remove one he dropped it, tearing the other in his haste to remove it, he flung it to the ground to rest next to its equally bloody twin.

He would not want Mirai to see him like this. Covered in blood, shaking like a stupid kid and afraid. That thought surprised him, his eyes narrowed as he removed the ladle from where it hung on the wall. He had not been afraid of anything in several years; he dipped the ladle into the rain barrel, watching absently as the water swirled around it then over the edges until it was full. It wasn't just anything that he was afraid of however, this was a fear of himself, of a terrible violence he was even now struggling to keep under control. It had surged through him after seeing Hanya and the others injured and he was certain he would have laid waste to half of Kyoto before he'd been satisfied. He had never thirsted for blood in this way, had never sought vengeance, he had merely upheld his duty to those he'd sworn loyalty. Lifting the ladle from the barrel he poured its contents slowly over his left hand, watching the blood of his enemy disappear into the small rocks that covered the ground. Thinking again that he would not want Mirai to see him like this. 

"Aoshi-sama?"

He brought his head up immediately at the soft, hesitant call of his name from a few feet away. His eyes, wide with surprise met hers filled with concern.

"Mirai." He whispered. 

"Are you hurt?" She asked her concern evident as she continued to inch closer.

Silence. 

"No." Aoshi relinquished a reply after several moments. He spoke evenly and watched as her eyes widened in horror at the sight of his blood-spattered face and clothing, clearly visible now that she was closer. "I am not hurt." 

"Aoshi… sama." Her gasp ended in a confused whisper, her hand reached out to him, hesitating momentarily before she pulled it back and dropped it to her side. He watched the gamut of emotions drift across her face, one being continually replaced by another as she pushed aside her shock, assessed what was before her and calmly asked him what happened.

"Please Mirai… " He had intended to tell her to leave but found he could not get the words out and so he remained silent as he refilled the ladle and poured it over his hand again, repeating it several times before she broke the silence.

"Do you think that I am somehow unaware of what it is the Oniwabanshu does?" Her quietly spoken question surprising him he looked up and met her eyes. She moved closer and continued. "I know what you are Aoshi-sama… I'm not afraid to see."

__

But I am afraid. He wanted to tell her. He wondered what she would say if he told her that he was afraid of himself of this violence that he could feel building in him. Would she still accept him, would she still claim to know and understand him? It was amazing that, despite the times they lived in, she was still so full of childlike wonder and acceptance. That being the very reason he had not wanted her to see him but somehow, he doubted that would change, that no matter what, she would always be as she was now.

"Mirai." He whispered and lifted his hands out so that she could see for herself how they shook. He watched as she slowly, cautiously, lowered her gaze to his hands. "I… am… I am…" 

"You're shivering with cold!" She interrupted saving him from admitting he was afraid. She touched the surface of the rainwater with her fingertips experimentally and hissed as she pulled it back out in a hurry. "This water is like ice! Why are you getting cleaned up out here?"

"Misao is inside," He followed her lead, choosing to ignore what was really troubling him. "I did not want to risk her seeing me like this."

"At this late hour?" She scolded taking the ladle from him she put a small amount in the bucket that hung from a nearby hook. "Misao should have been sent to bed hours ago."

"True." Aoshi laughed and sat down on the nearby bench as she commanded. "However, as you know her so well, you must be aware that she does not always do what she is told."

"Sou da." She whispered thoughtfully then grew quiet as she worked free the knot she had tied in his blue scarf, unwound it from her wrist and dipped it into the bucket of water. "You really do take good care of her."

Aoshi did not reply he merely sat quietly while she wiped the blood from his face. Relinquishing his hands, one at a time, as she demanded, so that she could scrub them clean with the silk scarf. It really had been his favorite, not to mention very expensive.

"Some day she'll want to return the favor…" He was momentarily confused at her words then nodded as he realized she was still referring to Misao. "Will you let her, I wonder?"

"Will I be able to stop her?" He laughed quietly a mental image of Misao when she was determined came to mind and he doubted he would be able to stop that tenacious kid from doing anything she set her mind to. 

"Yes." Mirai's voice affirmed quietly, the melancholy from the previous night when she spoke of the moon evident in her voice once again making him look at her sharply. "Your heart turned to ice, your cruel words and finally your silence will stop her."

"What are you talking about?" He asked his brows creasing in a confused frown, puzzling over her strange comment as much as the sudden sadness.

"Huh? Oh… Sorry." She stuttered then smiled, shaking her head as if to clear it. "I was… I was talking about… someone I know."

Aoshi's eyes narrowed at the hesitancy in her voice, the overly bright smile she used to cover up what she was really thinking. He was about to question her on whom the 'someone' was that she referred to when she interrupted him.

"Yatta! All finished!" She beamed taking both of his hands and holding them up so that he could indeed see that they were clean.

The blood wasn't the only thing gone he realized. His hands were no longer shaking and the fear and unease he felt earlier were gone; soothed away by her soft voice and cheerful nature. It was strange the effect she had on him and without even any conscious effort on her part or on his for that matter. Just being near her, gazing into her blue eyes, like he was now, evoked in him the desire to always have her near him, to share with her things he thought himself unable to share.

"Arigato Mirai." He whispered closing his fingers over her small hands that held his.

__

How did she manage to do this to him? He wondered as he gently pulled her toward him. _How?_ He brushed his lips across hers in a gentle caress. _How was it that he knew her so well, that she knew him so well after so short a time? _ He kissed the corner of her mouth, her cheek and her jaw. _How?_ He pressed a kiss to the sensitive skin of her neck, she gasped and he felt her hands tighten in his. _It was as if he had known her his entire life and simply been waiting for her, as if her heart understood his, but… how?_

"'How', what?" She whispered somewhere near his ear making him start and pull back.

"Did I say that out loud?" He asked his voice filled with disbelief, his eyes wide with surprise stared into deep blue. She nodded in confirmation and was silent for several minutes then asked again what he meant.

"I am just amazed." He answered after a long pause, still lost in her blue eyes he continued almost absently. "Have I really only known you for ten days?"

He had expected her to laugh at his stupidity and so he was at a loss when her eyes clouded over with sorrow rather than amusement. He let go her hands and placed them on her shoulders giving her a gentle squeeze.

"Yes, it has..." She affirmed quietly after several moments. She lifted her hand and brushed at the hair that fell across his forehead. She tried to smile past the sad look in her eyes and failed. "Ten days…" 

The words echoed over and over in her head, '…ten days… ten days… ten days'. The overwhelming sadness she felt at his words made absolutely no sense for she was not really parting from him; when she left here tonight, when she stepped into her own time Aoshi would be there. Still, it would be different; there would be no smooth hands that held hers, she would not feel the soft caress of his mouth against hers as she had only moments ago and how she would miss it. She had known him her entire life in one sense but the part of him that let her close enough to touch him, could still find the means to smile, that the one before her now would someday bury deep inside himself; she had only known for ten days.

"Yes, it has…" Misao agreed brushing back the hair that touched the tips of his eyelashes, unable to keep from smiling when he made no move to stop her as she knew he would in her own time, when he was older but still just as beautiful. "Ten days…"

"Mirai, dooshite?" He asked concern evident in his voice making her wonder for what must have been a thousand times how she was ever going to say goodbye to this man. She should not have come here at all, she should have stayed in the woods, pinned the note she'd written him to a tree with one of her kunai and returned to her own time. But she could not find it in herself to leave and when he did not appear, despite her better judgment she had come here looking for him.

It was strange the vulnerability he did not seem afraid to show her, the need for comfort he displayed. It was so unlike the Aoshi she knew who was never vulnerable, who didn't need anything. But, that wasn't true, knowing this Aoshi had taught her a great deal about the other, they were the same man after all. One of them had merely learned to hide things better as he got older and it was that one, she was certain, that was perhaps more vulnerable and more in need of comfort than the one before her now. Still, gazing into his blue-gray eyes, it would not make saying goodbye to this one any easier and Misao was glad she had taken the time to write the letter that remained tucked inside her obi. 

He climbed to his feet; his hands dropping from her shoulders he stepped away from her. She stared incredulously at this sudden change in his behavior wondering what could have possibly made him react in such a way and then she felt it, someone was approaching.

"Okashira?" The voice called quietly from the darkness. "We have news."

"Hai." Aoshi acknowledged and she could feel the presence of the messenger disappear just as quickly as he came. It looked as though she was going to tell him goodbye sooner than she expected.

"Aoshi-sama, I have something to give you before I leave tonight." She reached into the folds of her obi for the note.

"This will not take long." He grabbed her wrist before she could remove the note, leading her through Okina's garden toward the doorway that led into the Aoiya. His intention suddenly becoming clear to her Misao dug her heals in, to which he paid no attention and continued to haul her along behind him.

"Aoshi-sama." She protested. "I shouldn't be here, you have matters that you need to tend to and I… I should go."

"Don't make me order you to stay Mirai." He stopped and turned back and she could see in his eyes that he would if he had to. She had so little time left here; it certainly wouldn't hurt to spend all that remained of that time with him. The younger version of herself would be asleep so there was very little chance of her breaking the one rule of coming face to face with her while she was in this time. Smiling she nodded her acquiescence to Aoshi who smiled in return and let go of her wrist, letting her follow him on her own.

He left her standing in the hallway just as he had the other night when he'd brought her to clean up her wounds; no one had passed by or come out of their room yet but the longer she stood here the greater the chance that someone would. She eyed the doorway that was once her room warily, the shoji were firmly closed but sounds of a restless little girl could be heard on the other side. 

__

Damn it! She thought irritated as she could hear the little hiccups that indicated the beginning of her crying; Misao knew what was coming next. _Why didn't they make me behave better?_

At the sounds of little feet hitting the floor and the sobs growing louder she quickly headed down the hall in the opposite direction. She slipped into the first open shoji she came to, sliding it shut just in time to muffle the sound of her own childhood voice wailing, quietly at first then louder and more desperate, 'Aoshi-sama… Aoshi-sama!'

Like clockwork she could hear the light, almost noiseless steps moving across the floor, she stood silent and still listening for the magical words from the only voice that could soothe the child when she was in this state.

"Why are you crying Misao?"

She could almost see him squatting down in front of the little girl, her arms going about his neck and him lifting her, carrying her back to her futon. He would stay with her until she fell asleep which never took very long and she would imagine that even heaven could not compare to how she felt with him beside her.

Misao sighed wistfully at the memory of how she felt back then, sometimes she wished things could be like that again.

The faint smell of antiseptic drifted in the air and she wrinkled her nose then she noticed the faint sounds of breathing and realized that this room had not been empty despite the door being open. She turned her head and could see that someone was in here, someone that was injured by the looks of the supplies that were sitting on the floor next to the futon. Her eyes drifted to the person's face and her heart skipped several beats. 

"Hanya!" Misao gasped quietly as she recognized the injured figure lying on the futon. She felt the tears filling her eyes and clamped a hand over her mouth to keep from sobbing aloud while her other hand clutched at the sudden ache in her chest. She'd lived with the pain of his death for nearly two years and now here he was, before her and still alive. She knew she should leave, she should be thankful at simply being able to meet Aoshi in this past time and not tempt the fates by remaining here and being discovered; still, she did not turn away.

__

He's drugged. She thought at hearing his deep, heavy, breathing. She inched closer; he failed to respond to her presence and she doubted he would wake up from his drug-induced sleep. She knelt beside the futon, quietly watching his chest rise and fall with each breath.

__

I shouldn't be here. She thought silently wiping at her tears and without any intention of doing so her hand was suddenly reaching, lowering to where his lay still, atop the blanket that covered him. She stopped short of touching him, with the realization that what she was about to do might wake him. But, after tonight she would not be back here again. He would be lost to her forever once more. The opportunity to say all the things that she wished she had upon learning of his death would not come again. She hesitated no longer and closed the small distance remaining between her fingertips and the back of his rough hand. She felt him twitch slightly as her hand covered his but then he was still.

Fresh tears filled her eyes and spilled down her cheeks, wetting the same tracks that she had only moments ago wiped dry. She lowered her head, squeezed her eyes shut tight and clenched her fist in her lap, all in an effort to stop her tears. They simply would not be contained, however and she soon felt the droplets hitting her thigh; having gathered and grown heavy they fell from her chin. She could not say how long she sat there; time seemed to stop with the onslaught of her tears, suddenly jolting forward again as she felt the slow movement of his hand turning over and his fingers curling around hers. 

Her head snapped up, her eyes wide as they met his through the mask, the only face that she had ever known him to have. For one who had so much to say to this man she was suddenly shocked into silence, the only sound she was able to emit was that of her sniffling. 

"Misao-chan… dooshite?" He whispered his voice groggy from the drugs. "Why are you crying?"

__

How? She wondered unable to fathom how he knew that it was she who was with him when he knew her to be a small child and the person that was now holding his hand, very clearly was not. It was quite possible that he was acting on his chi sensing abilities only, the drugs might make it difficult for his eyesight to focus but seven or seventeen, she was still Misao and he would certainly be able to sense this.

"Hanya." His name all she could manage through her sniffles.

"Misao-chan." She felt the light touch of his hand on her cheek, just as he used to do when she was a child. "Tell me what's wrong."

"I… I miss you." She choked out quietly. _For an eternity I will miss you._

"I missed you too." He wiped at the endless tears spilling from her eyes. "But Aoshi-sama brought you back home; there's no need for you to cry now."

She nodded, sniffled again and tried her best to return the smile she could see in his eyes. One would never know he smiled simply by looking at the twisted mouth of the mask he wore, his smile always showed in his eyes and she never failed to find it shining back at her. She had taken for granted the many things he had given her, not material things but things that meant so much more. Although she knew that she could not change the events of the future, that in a year he would leave her behind at the Aoiya. In eight years his life would end without her ever seeing him again, at least she could be certain he would know that all he had done was appreciated.

"Thank you Hanya." She sniffled again pulling his hand away from her cheek and holding it in both of hers. She noticed his eyes narrowing and continued before he could ask what she meant. "For always being so kind, for looking out for me and teaching me so many things. You have been the best Oniichan a girl could ask for."

"Misao-chan…" He whispered and she could tell he was overwhelmed.

__

Time. She prayed clutching tighter to his hand, her eyes squeezing shut tight against the beginning of new tears. _I have no right to ask any more of you but please… please stop._

"Ne! Misao-chan?"

"Hai" She answered him feeling the futility of her prayer.

"Aoshi-sama will be upset if he finds you in here." He warned her. "You should be in bed."

She smiled and chuckled lightly through her tears.

"Hai… Oniichan." She teased earning a soft chuckle from behind the mask. Lifting his hand once again she kissed it, feeling him tighten his grasp briefly before she returned it to his side on the futon and rose to her feet. "Oyasumi Hanya."

"Oyasumi Misao-chan."

She walked to the shoji and stepped out turning back to glance at him once more and whispering silently, _'sayonara'_ before sliding the door shut. Standing motionless on the other side, unable to move; her head bowed, she closed her eyes tight trying unsuccessfully to stop her tears. She did not know how long she stood there before she felt the light pressure of a familiar hand on her shoulder, opening her eyes at the familiar whisper of her name, or the name she had assumed in this time. She felt herself being led away, the distinctive sound of a shoji door sliding closed and light footsteps coming closer to where she stood in the middle of the room. She was in Aoshi's room and his arms, protective and warm wrapped around her from behind pulling her back against him, he rest his chin on the top of her head. 

"Hanya." She squeaked out in her quivering, tear-laden voice before he could ask her what was wrong. "I saw Hanya."

She felt his arms tighten about her then loosen as he lifted his hands to her shoulders and turned her around to face him. She slipped her arms around his waist and held on, her hands fisting in the fabric of his clothing she buried her face against his chest and continued to cry, for Hanya, for Aoshi and for herself.

Aoshi held the trembling girl in his arms and let her weep. He completely understood her feelings at seeing Hanya injured; where she reacted with tears, however, he reacted with anger, a frighteningly, violent anger that made his own body tremble with the effort to control it. Just as he had been soothed earlier by her voice, he was now by her quiet tears. It was as if she knew that he had long since lost the ability to shed tears for others and was providing him the means to do so, through her, as she wept they both wept. His arms tightened around her, his anger gone; his trembling hands now steady.

He did not know how long they stood there before her crying subsided into the occasional hiccup and then finally only the odd sniffle. He could feel the dampness of his clothing where her tears had soaked through the fabric. He kissed her flower scented hair on top of her head then pulled back and cupped her cheek, lifting her face up to see her liquid blue eyes.

__

She is so beautiful. He thought, his thumb drawing small circles gently over her cheek then moving to brush lightly across her mouth. So beautiful and so familiar, it was as if he'd known her his entire life and been waiting for her, like a lover in a past life, if one believed in such things. She could feel it too; he could see it plainly in her eyes that stared back at him. He slowly lowered his lips and kissed away the final tear that still clung to her cheek.

"Stay with me Mirai." He whispered against her skin. "Don't go."

"Aoshi-s… " 

__

Not tonight. He thought as the pressure of his mouth cut off the honorific that inevitably followed whenever she spoke his name. _Tonight he was simply Aoshi_.

He tightened his arms about her waist pulling her closer. She stepped into his embrace willingly and surrendered when he sought to deepen their kiss, letting a small moan escape into his mouth. The heavy, silk, rope of her braided hair brushed against his arms and he could not stem the shiver in reaction to the erotic feel and wondered, not for the first time, what it would be like to have those silken locks spilling over him. To tangle his hands into the blue-black mass of satin, free of the confining braid she always wore.

He closed a hand around her braid and ran down the length of it, reaching the small clasp that held it in place he slipped it deftly from her hair. Opening his hand he let the ring fall from his fingers to the floor where it rolled noisily until it came in contact with something and stopped.

He felt her hands leaving his shoulders, drifting up as her arms snaked around his neck, her fingers burying themselves in his hair. His own fingers going to the long mane of black silk that had nearly un-woven from the braid, pulling free the last bit that remained interlaced. He was unable to stem the moan from deep inside as his hands tangled within the mass of her long, black hair. 

"Stay Mirai." He whispered against her mouth between kisses. "Stay with me."

There was an imposing silence as she grew completely still and he waited.

"Yes." She breathed and the press of her lips quickly followed her warm breath against his neck.

He would not give her the chance to change her mind and without hesitation he lifted her chin and his mouth closed hungrily over hers, feeling her respond in kind almost immediately. Aoshi tightened his arms around her waist, his hands sliding to the small of her back to pull her in tighter against him. He groaned against her mouth as the feel of her pressing against him heated up his flesh through his clothing.

His lips left hers to trail kisses down her throat to her shoulder, his hands making quick work of the complicated bow of her obi at her back; he enjoyed the erotic sound of the rustling silk as it unwound from her waist and pooled at their feet. Her shirtfront gaped open without the obi to hold it closed and she flinched when his hands touched her bare skin. She was so soft beneath his hands, he spread his fingers wide across her waist, and the feel of her was overwhelming. He brought his hands up to rest lightly on her shoulders, then keeping his touch feather light he slid his fingers beneath the fabric of her uniform and slipped it from her shoulders. Lifting his lips from hers he looked, for the first time, at what he would believe until he died was the most beautiful thing he'd ever seen. 

"You are so beautiful Mirai." He spoke his feelings. He lifted one hand and cupped her cheek, brushing his thumb across her lips, swollen from his kiss. One stray lock of hair hung over her shoulder and with his fingertips he trailed along its path. Brushing lightly over her creamy skin, her chest rising and falling rapidly under his hand as he moved his fingers over the tip of her breast. She inhaled sharply and his eyes sought hers once more, encouraged when he watched them flutter closed under his caress, her teeth biting into her bottom lip and a delicate moan emanating from her throat. He leaned in to once again touch his lips to hers and he could not help but whisper again. "You are so beautiful."

Aoshi pulled her hands from where they clutched at his shoulders down to her sides and held them there while he kissed her. He released them and slowly traced his fingertips up her arms feeling her shiver under his light caress. He paused at her shoulders, his fingers rest lightly against her skin, his mouth moved away from hers and she lifted her chin, invitingly. As his lips kissed her neck his fingers resumed their path over her shoulders and across her collarbone, his mouth following close behind, kissing and nipping at her flesh lightly with his teeth. His hands drifted down to her breasts, his fingers brushed over them lightly and again his mouth followed. 

She had her hands in his hair, pulling him against her moaning aloud with pleasure. He could not help but smile in satisfaction at her abandonment, knowing that it was he who drove her there, the he could send her further over the edge if he wished. He straightened and brushed his lips across her neck before returning to her mouth. He pressed a hand into the small of her back wanting her closer, wanting to mold her body against his, he felt her small hands pulling and tugging at his shirt, she managed to get it over one shoulder but no further. The press of her naked breasts against him, the feel of her soft hands moving over his skin and finally the feel of her mouth planting kisses across his chest became too much for even his efforts at self-control. Lifting her off the floor he moved to the futon and set her down, she helped him with his shirt and soon they were both without their clothing, a tangle of arms and legs on the futon. 

He thought again how lovely she looked, her hair fanned out beneath her, the way her pale skin glowed; his mouth was suddenly on hers, kissing her fiercely before moving on to her neck, the hollow of her throat then lower. His mouth was everywhere on her, his lips, his teeth, branding her body with his kiss marks. There was no part of her that his lips did not touch and she was writhing beneath the hands that followed the path of his mouth. They were both on fire, burning within flames that had only one means to be extinguished, to burn even hotter as one. He moved over her and could see the flames leaping in her eyes, she kissed fire into his mouth, burning him further with her lips and as he sank into her he could only think, 'burn me, burn me, burn me.'

----

__

I was wrong. Misao thought looking down at Aoshi still asleep on the futon_. I was wrong when I thought that it wouldn't hurt to spend all that remained of my time here with him_. It was hurting like hell right now just trying to leave but looking at the window across the room she could tell that the night was close to being over and she had no choice but to go before he awoke. She was surprised that he had slept through her climbing out of bed and getting dressed. She had not wanted to press her luck by taking the time to braid her hair, she had, in fact, stuffed the note she had written him inside the metal clasp and set it in the empty space on the futon she had only moments ago vacated. She stepped through the shoji door that she had quietly slid open and turned back. _Just one more look_. She promised herself.

"Aoshi-sama… sayonara." She whispered brokenly then slid the door shut and moved on silent feet through the Aoiya and outside. She slipped on her shoes and tread quietly through Okina's garden, stopping when she saw the blue scarf that she had used earlier to clean the blood from Aoshi's face and hands. She had rinsed it in the rainwater and hung it to dry and there it remained, billowing in the light breeze. She lifted it from the back of the bench and carried it with her into the forest.

Aoshi stirred, something was disturbing the first peaceful night of sleep he'd had in ages, the warmth that had surrounded him earlier was gone, he could hear the rustling of silk, of someone moving and a voice… was someone calling him? Even though he was still blanketed by the clouded haze of sleep, long practice had taught him not to ignore the intuition nagging at him and he slowly opened his eyes. He turned his head and the emptiness beside him brought everything rushing back. He sat up quickly, his eyes searching every corner and finding no trace of Mirai anywhere. It was as if she had never been there, except that he could still smell the flowery scent of her hair, feel the smoothness of her skin against him. His hand touched something cool and he looked down to find the gold ring that held her hair, he picked it up and immediately noticed the paper inside.

__

A letter? His heart began to race as he recalled exactly what it was that had woken him up, the whisper of his name followed by 'sayonara'. His fist tightened around the gold clasp that held the piece of paper he did not want to unfold. He knew what it meant, not once when they had parted company in those ten nights had she ever told him goodbye and now she had even left him a letter. He could feel no trace of her near him.

"Mirai where did you go?" His quiet voice ringing loud in the silence of his room. He opened his hand and stared at the gold ring that he had removed from her hair hours ago. He did not want to read the note inside because he knew what it would tell him; that she was gone. If he didn't read it he could continue to look for her, to search every inch of Japan until he found her. He let out a small laugh, she had no hope of hiding from him, he was too good at what he did, and he would find her. He looked to through the window and the smile from his laughter faded as he noticed that the stars were fading in the fast approaching dawn and the moon had disappeared, bringing back the words she spoke the night before…

__

"The moon. It's waning." 

"It always does." He had told her. "This is the law of nature."

"Only one day left… and the full moon will be over."

"Ah."

She really was gone and although he had not realized the significance of those words the night before, but now, with the letter he now held in the palm of his hand he did. She would not be back and he would never find her, no matter how long and hard he looked. He pulled the letter from inside the small ring and unfolded it. It was his eyes that read the words scrawled across the paper but it was her voice that he heard saying goodbye…

Aoshi-sama. No matter how much I may wish it, the laws of time will not allow me to stay and so, just as the moon disappears so must I. There were so many things I wanted to tell you during our time together but I did not have the courage, even now, writing this letter, knowing that it is you who is going to read these words inhibits me. Still, I know that if I do not say these things to you I will regret it for the rest of my life and knowing how I lose all sense of self when I'm with you I am forced to write them down.

I love you. Please don't think I'm being foolish by saying this, or that I'm too young to know my own heart and mind. I have known you my entire life and yes I have loved you from the beginning in one way or another; love evolves, however, just like people do and I am no longer a little girl. What I feel for you is the love of a woman for a man; it's that simple and even if you find you cannot return my feelings, mine will not change.

I hope that you will learn to be more forgiving, to others and to yourself. We all do things that we regret later, some may seem unforgivable but those who love you, your family, your friends will always forgive your mistakes. Some day soon this war is going to end Aoshi-sama, please do not let it be the end of you as well.

I must not have had as much to say as I thought for my mind is suddenly blank, if you take nothing else from this letter I would like you to at least remember that wherever you go, whatever happens, please know that I am always with you. Always 

1 year later…

Aoshi stood in the small clearing for the first time in many months; he had been hopeful in the beginning, believing that she would return and he'd continued to visit this spot again and again waiting for her. She did not return, he had finally accepted that she never would. It was odd and very ironic that he should choose this day, the day that she had left, to leave himself. The war was over, his side had lost; he'd been offered several valuable posts within the new government but he could not turn his back on the others. What were Hanya and the other old-fashioned warriors who had served him so faithfully to do? He made his choice; they would all leave together and find work that suited their skills.

He had Okina's promise to look after Misao and made his good byes to those who would remain at the Aoiya. This was his final goodbye. But how could it be goodbye when she said she would always be with him. His hand clutched the small gold ring in the pocket of his trench coat. Wherever he went, whatever happens, she would always be with him. He took comfort in those words of hers, knowing that it was true. 

"Let's go Hanya." He turned as he spoke, the others falling in step behind him.

8 years later…

His arms were aching, his knuckles bloody and stinging as he surveyed the four upright stones over the recently disturbed soil. They were gone, Hanya and the other Oniwabanshu were gone, and all that remained of them was lying beneath the dirt, marked by the stones that stared coldly back at him. Aoshi shivered, he had not felt so cold, so weak and so alone in his entire life. 

__

What happened Mirai? I thought you said you would always be with me? His thoughts silent as he looked at the small gold ring he held in the palm of his hand. _I don't feel you with me now, I feel nothing now, except that terrible violence that frightened me so long ago._

Slipping his hands into his pockets Aoshi closed his eyes against the four stones before him only to have the vision of them being murdered before him once again. His eyes flew open and he swayed on his feet for a moment before righting himself. Again he could only stare at the four stones.

"The war was not the end of me Mirai, but this…" He whispered as he walked away. "this will be."

---

Misao sat in the clearing of the forest; it had been five days since her visits to the past had come to an end. The kiss marks that Aoshi had left on her body were fading but the memory of him imprinting her with them was not. She still had her Aoshi-sama here but she had carefully avoided him since that night. A little embarrassed and afraid, that wasn't so bad, she could deal with those feelings but there were other feelings that she could not deal with. The closeness she had shared with him, having him hold her, touch her in the way she had always wanted him to then to come back to the same man and have him treat her like a stranger or worse, a child. It was better to avoid him all together than give him the chance to hurt her, even if he didn't realize it. Still, tears filled her eyes and spilled down her cheeks, she missed him terribly.

A shadow fell across her and she need not look up to know who it was. No one else moved so silently through a forest and no one else could make her feel as he did simply by being near.

"Why are you crying Misao?" He asked quietly towering over her.

The same words she had heard him speak to the upset child in the past time. It grated on her nerves to know that he would use the same tone, the same words as if she were still that child. She was seventeen, a woman, couldn't he see that? Would he ever see that? 

"I know that we are not equals Aoshi-sama, that my accomplishments will never be so great as yours." She did not look at him as she spoke. She was angry and she was tired of not being taken seriously, of still being seen as nothing more than a child, especially by him. "Still, don't I deserve some measure of respect from you?" 

He was quiet for a long time, if his shadow had not blocked out the sun she might have thought he left her there. He stepped closer and she closed her eyes against his nearness.

"Don't think so little of yourself." He spoke softly and her eyes flew open to look up at him. "You have accomplished a great many things and you have more than my respect."

__

Huh? What the hell was this? She thought watching him grow closer as he crouched down in front of her. _Did he mean what he said?_ She knew he never said anything without meaning but still her own self-doubt where he was concerned refused to allow her to accept his words for what they were.

"Aoshi-s…" She began but the press of his index finger against her lips stopped her. Her eyes widened even further as she stared at him, wondering what could have brought on this turn of events. A moment ago she'd been hell bent on avoiding him because of his coldness and now here he was, seeking her out and behaving anything but cold toward her.

"You were right you know." His soft voice surprised her again. He removed his finger from her lips and held his fisted hand out in front of her. "No matter what happened, no matter where I went, you were always with me."

Her heart began to pound in her chest as she heard the words from her letter repeated back to her. She watched as his fingers uncurled and there, resting in his palm was the gold clasp from her hair.

"Even if I didn't always realize it." He whispered. "You were always with me." 

She reached out to take it from his hand only to have his fingers close over hers and pull her to him; his arms wrapped around her and held her in a fierce embrace. She didn't care if he squeezed the life out of her at that moment; she slid her arms around his waist and buried her face against his neck.

"I'm sorry it took me so long Misao." She heard him whisper followed by the soft feel of his lips against her hair as he pressed a kiss upon it.

The feel of her arms sliding around his waist, her small hands on his back as she returned his embrace and her warm cheek pressed against his chest. He was starting to tremble with emotion and for several minutes he could not speak as time slowed and then stopped. 

"I'm sorry it took me so long Misao." He finally whispered brushing a kiss against her hair then grew silent again.

It was the same, she was the same… her warmth, her serenity, everything about her invading his senses, just like before when he held her. He drew in a long steadying breath in an attempt to gain control of the chaotic scramble of his emotions. He brought his hand around to cup her cheek as he pulled back to look at her, brushing the wispy strands back and tucking them behind her ear, losing himself in her blue eyes. 

"How long?" Her soft voice questioned him after several minutes of silence. "How long have you known?"

__

How long had he known? He wondered absently as his fingers trailed lightly over her cheek, her brow and across her forehead as if familiarizing himself with the feel of her again. He could recall their time together in the past with perfect clarity and he had often thought then that she was somehow familiar, like the lover from a past life he recalled thinking. That was more the truth now, for they had not been lovers until, what for her was but a few nights ago. He could feel the heat invading his body at the memory of that night, of her skin against his, a night that there may still prove to be consequences of. That was a sobering thought and not something he would choose this moment to talk to her about, although he must very soon; innocent as she was in respect to such things he doubted she had even considered it.

He closed his eyes and pressed his forehead against hers, recalling so many things, things that were painful, things that he would wish forgotten but knew could not be, should not be. Those things were what shaped him, made him who is, the one she loved enough to manipulate time for and they should not be wished away. Perhaps he might have felt differently after the death of Hanya and the other Oniwabanshu knowing that Misao and Mirai were the same and that she was there, in Kyoto, that he at least had something, or rather someone to return to. He had not known however and upon his return, in his demented, rage-filled state, he was certain that it would have made no difference. He might have seen Misao and been comforted, the violence soothed as she had done before but more likely he would have still seen what he believed at that time to be the ghost of that girl he'd met so many years ago. Mirai's ghost, staring at him with eyes so filled with hurt and betrayal after his attack on Okina that he'd turned his back on her, unable to bear the accusation in her eyes, the whisper of her one worded question…

'Why?' She had asked, the hurt in her eyes echoed in her voice and he could not bear it… what right did her ghost have haunting him? She had promised she would always be with him and he'd felt that she always was, until Kanryu's gatling gun pierced the room with the sound of death. Then he'd felt cold and alone, with no one to comfort him… no one and nothing but rage; rage so clear that it was almost brilliant in its purity. Rage so violent that he and many others, including her, would bear scars from its aftermath.

In his dance with insanity he did not welcome the sight of her, the obvious hurt in her eyes, even if she was a ghost he did not want to see her again and whispered his thoughts aloud before walking away. He nearly halted in his retreat when he was certain he could hear her crying, he had paused for a split second before continuing on; almost laughing as he recalled that she had merely been an apparition and therefore any tears that she shed were imagined as well. It wasn't until his fight with Himura at Shishio's stronghold that his frazzled psyche had begun to piece the fragments together. Once Himura knocked him into the next week with his succession technique, was bid to start answering for her tears and left to face Mirai's ghost again only to be told that it was Misao, all fell into place. She… Misao, through the sheer force of her will or a gift from the gods had somehow managed to come back in time. He spent many hours in contemplation upon his return to the Aoiya, wondering how she had managed it and why he had failed to recognize her. As to the how, he concluded that he simply did not care, she had done it and he was glad for it. His failure to recognize her was that he had simply failed to look… the truth was there all along, the uncanny way she'd felt so familiar, as if he'd always known her, the flowery scent of her hair just like Misao's. The things Misao said as a little girl that would trigger thoughts of Mirai, her blue eyes, beautiful and endless. He opened his eyes to gaze into the cerulean eyes that even now captivated him with their brightness. From little girl to young adult, Misao or Mirai, they never changed.

__

How long had he known she asked him… In his heart he had always known, just as he'd known that she was always with him, as she said she would be. 

"I have always known Misao." He whispered lowering his lips until only a hair's breadth remained between them, smiling as her eyes fluttered closed. He brushed his lips against hers lightly, feeling the trembling of hers beneath. He reached down and pulled her hands from around his waist and climbed to his feet, dragging her up with him.

"Aoshi-sama?" He flinched at the softly spoken question, she really had no idea how much he hated hearing that title from her; it was something that did not belong between the two of them and he would definitely put an end to it… later.

"Come." He told her taking her hand and heading toward the Aoiya. "We have a great deal to make up for… ne Mirai?"

He stifled her laughter with the pressure of his lips against hers, pulling her against him briefly before resuming their walk back to the Aoiya and the privacy of his room.

----

He could hear the birds chirping through the window as the night gave way to dawn. He had lain awake for most of the night curled into her side, a possessive arm about her waist, his head against her breast moving with the rise and fall of her breathing. He had thought to ask her how she had managed to perform the miracle that she did and had been on the verge of doing so but the thought vanished as quickly as it came. The past was best left where it was, he was content just being with her again, feeling her warm body next to his and listening to her heart beating beneath his ear. He had so many things he wanted to tell her.

She moved beneath him, her body growing restless as it sensed morning's advance, absently running a hand over his back, sending a shiver racing up his spine.

"Mmm… Aoshi-sama." She whispered sleepily.

The first thing he would talk to her about is dropping that damned 'Aoshi-sama' business; he didn't want any formality between them, no separation in status, just Aoshi and Misao, nothing more. 


End file.
